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A Quiet Place


Hush a moment, haad your gobs,

Quiet in the battle-ground:

Let the twitter-feeding yobs

Hear the pin drop, stripped of sound –

Keep the noise down, tip the wink,

Kit Kat body parts are pink.


Close your ears, avert your lips,

No noise in the screenings, please:

Let the stealthy battleships

Sail in silence on the seas –

Cradles set to gentle rocking,

Kit Kat parts are pink and shocking.


Soft-shoe through the moral maze,

Keep the bomb-doors soft, discreet:

When you reach the loading bays,

Make sure all have slippered feet –

Keep the action tip-toe, pit-pat,

Do not crunch the pinko Kit Kat.


Cat-like, cross the terra firma

To delete the names and numbers:

Never even risk a murmur

While the idiot monster slumbers –

Let your fingers, sleek and dapper,

Stroke the new pink Kit Kat wrapper.




Click here for the BBC story on the snackers


Click here for the Guardian story about the Kit Kats





A Quiet Place

Horror film addicts, watching A Quiet Place, in which people try to escape monsters sensitive to sound, have complained about noisy snackers. Pink Kit Kats have gone on sale. The UK and USA prepared to attack Syria, or perhaps by proxy, Russia, after another outbreak of chemical warfare.

13 April 2018


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