The kilt is a nice bit of woollen,
And the kaftan's a good bit of silk.
A coat made of white
Keeps a nurse warm at night,
And it suits men who bring you your milk.
The SAS wear balaclavas,
And the Lone Ranger's mask is a must.
A well-wimpled nun
On a motorbike's fun -
But she's wearing a helmet, I trust.
A clown wears a red nose and pancake;
George Michael looks great in his shades.
You can cut quite a dash
With a bowler and sash
When you're out on the Orange parades.
The busby conceals the nice sentry
Who keeps guard of the Queen and her crown;
An anorak's hood
Makes the rambler look good,
And a mortar-board goes with a gown.
I love both the veil and the burqa,
And a mitre's a wonderful hoot.
What browns me off (or,
Is the very last straw)
Is a minister's miserable suit.