Fake Fiction
Darcy didn’t really brood
His muscles were not busting out
He was no dark and handsome dude
He did not sport a sullen pout
No ladies, he had permatan
Subsisted on a spree of junk
KFC – he was a fan
Quite a mountain, quite a hunk
He wore a startling powder quiff
Squeaked his way from dawn to dawn
Wasn’t Elvis, wasn’t Cliff
Spoke and ate much plastic corn
Darcy sadly did not loom
Over the whirling waltzing floor
The truth alas leaves little room
With all the balls he’s famous for
All those facts that must be kennelled!
Darcy was a dirty dog
Darcy’s name was really Donald
The rest is lost in Austen’s fog
Click here for a Telegraph article
Click here for an Independent article