the weekly

Conversations with a SatNav

A little voice inside my ear

Informs me where to go:

Shall I turn right? I say to her –

Of course my dear. And so,


I plunge ahead, my sidelights dim,

Avoid each bump, tubercle:

My wheel is neat, my gear-box trim.

You’ve gone round in a circle.


Turn round when possible, she drawls.

I drive on, careless, hatless –

At times her conversation palls.

I miss my A5 atlas.


I do not like to wait, to pause:

Far rather, I’d be pacey.

There’s no reverse gear, so she roars.

I ask her, Are you Tracy?


Perhaps the weird sensation comes

From slowly being towed.

Hey George, she says, You done your sums?

I say, I’m off the road.


Yes, as the Chancellor, I send

My colleagues wild. I guess

I’m up the creek and round the bend.

I blame my G.P.S.



Click here for a Telegraph article




Conversations with a SatNav

A survey says we have forgotten how to navigate, the fault of GPS. Tracy Morgan said there was no reverse gear on the government’s academy plans, although the Chancellor, George Osborne, is constantly changing direction.

31 March 2016


Home/Join | List | Next | Previous | Random