the weekly


The numbers have gone missing,

The dossiers gone astray –

The files unfiled, unreconciled –

It is the British way.


The villains, dark and damp and

Rampant as old rams,

Are out of ploys, except the noise

Made by a shredder's jam.


Someone knows the secret,

Keeps the state afloat,

And how they’re checkered's off the record,

And none have left a note.


Of course it may mean nothing,

Be merely froth and scum –

The documents may not be bent.

We can’t know. They are dumb.


I like it in this country,

I like it here. Don't you?

The country of the free, what glee –

We all begin, brand new.


The past is just the past,

The last decade a blur.

It's better that we wear our hats

As tight as this. Yes, sir.




Click here for a Guardian article


Click here for Bill’s New Statesman research


Click here to buy Bill’s collection, Ringers


Files alleging impropriety by former British politicians have gone missing, as Norman Tebbit regrets.

8 July 2014


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