the weekly


Some things are beyond the pale
At an Elvis auction sale:
Bidders never hesitated
Over his Bible, annotated,
But no-one offered cards or cheques
For what he wore beneath his kecks.

Well, I suppose that, in your study,
Elvis as a Bible buddy
Might not fill you full of gloom,
While, sprawling in your living room,
You’d baulk and pause and not look up
And what he wore when All Shook Up.

From Genesis to Revelation
Elvis brings you celebration:
Memories of hectic youth
Hidden in the gospel truth;
And maybe you’d not rather stare
At The King’s soiled underwear,

But perhaps you should return to sender
Holy books. He loved you tender:
Better then, lest you forget,
To hold on to the stains and sweat,
To think of how we all perspire,
Not how we mark up Jeremiah.

Human beings are not unctions,
But made of bodies and their functions –
Romney’s longjohns, Obama’s briefs
May tell you who should be the chief:
And for nostalgia and romance,
You’re better off with Elvis’s pants.

Click here to read a Guardian article

Click here to buy Bill’s poetry collection, Ringers


Elvis’s Bible sold for over fifty thousand dollars. But his underpants didn’t make the reserve price.

11 September 2012


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