SuperVeg
I look like standard broccoli
But I am really wild
I’ll save the Earth from death and dearth
And rescue any child
Who’s ever had forced through its lips
A diet made of Coke and chips
Yes I am SuperBroccoli,
The Clark Kent of the veg
When at the grocer’s, do look closer
And see my hard raw edge
I may look mild and privet-green
But I am marvellously keen
For I am no romancer
Like chavvy avocado
My soul is pure, I’m cancer’s cure
I am like Brigitte Bardot –
Sex on legs and fond of cats
And wearer of a dozen hats
The wondrous David Willetts
Has praised me to the skies
Has praised me to the skies
The Coalition’s dietitians
Have asked me to advise
I’ll solve the missing trillions scam
I’m SuperBroccoli, yes I am
World peace will be a doddle
And though I say this cockily
One armed bandits, falling standards
They’re ripe for SuperBroccoli
The world is saved! What happiness!
(I’ll be on sale in M&S)