Gone To Grind
When managing money I find
It's hard to relax or unwind -
***When doing my sums
***I am chewing my gums:
And the work is a terrible grind.
When I started, my cuspids were pearly,
But my clients have turned rather surly.
***Watch their interest crash
***And my mouth starts to gnash:
And I may need to leave my desk early.
I won't take my bonus: I've sworn;
But my jaws ache from dusk through to dawn.
***I'm coming a cropper,
***I need a false chopper,
I'm fed up to my back teeth (they're worn).
Though I've run up the national bill,
I tell you, I think I am ill.
***I don't like to wheedle
***But I know the needle
And afterwards, I know the drill.
My specialist thinks he is gentle,
But he is the dark side of dental:
***My premolars splinter
***Like ice in mid-winter:
It's honestly driving me mental.
Finance? It used to be great,
And Lord how I drank and I ate!
***But now I am wracked
***And my gob (which is smacked)
Thinks of gum-shield, of bridge and of plate.
If I join the ranks of the skint –
And it looks like there's more than a hint -
***Though my smile isn't sunny,
***Here's a truth about money:
Orthodontists are making a mint.