The Naked Rambler
Did you read about the naked rambler
How everywhere he fights the law
Did you read about the naked rambler
The one stuck in the judge's craw
He don't wear a stitch each morning
He's not a shirt-and-trouser bloke
Prefers the suit that he was born in
And the judge she thinks he is no joke
Talkin' about the naked rambler
Who struts the roads and in the raw
Talkin' about the naked rambler
Did you see him make the courtroom door
Conducting his defence when kiltless
Before the Scottish prudes in Perth
Did he really think they'd find him guiltless?
Expect them to be full of mirth?
Well you heard about an Eric Ambler,
The kind of book you read for thrills?
You heard about the Moto Scrambler
That rides astride the mud-slide hills?
But they're nothing to the naked rambler
The nudist with the knapsack load
You got to treat him … firmly … with anger
You got take him … off the … public road
And if you ever meet the naked rambler
With his heavy boots and total tan
Don't forget that it's the naked rambler
And a very very dangerous man
It is best to give yourself protection
(What about a freshly sharpened knife?)
Till the judge amends his fresh complexion
And she sends him into jail for life …
Read the Telegraph article here