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Holy Moses

Man, I've been high on the mountain,
And it blew me away, in a flash.
The whole world lit up like a candy-stripe fountain:
And these tablets, hey? Helluva stash.

I heard God, man: cooler than placid.
When He spoke it was almost non-verbal:
It was stronger than skunk, and better than acid,
Or anything out of my herbal.

His voice! It was deep, it was hollow.
He was like just a shape with a beard.
And here's His Commandments, they're easy to follow –
But wow, it was so freaking weird.

I feel like I've been for a bevy,
Been out of my skull and my brain –
Hey! what's with this calf, man? That looks pretty heavy:
No way, Aaron – man, what a pain –

God the Great Dealer don't love it,
I was there, yeah, I heard what was spoken.
This bling ain't the thing. It'll lead you to covet –
You've slipped – so have I – hell, they're broken!

I'll have to go back. He'll be raving.
He may stone me, or rattle His whip.
The next time I'm back, man, be sure you're behaving:
Sinai's one major trip.

Click here for the story in The Guardian.

Holy Moses
Professor Benny Shanon of the Hebrew University of Jerusalem has claimed that Moses was high on hallucinogens when he set the ten commandments down.
March 5 2008


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